// you know, thought about adding deleting of nodes from the
// tree, but then i was drinking, and i was like no, f*ck it,
// f*ck that, just add a stupid f*cking 4 byte integer, and
// when the shit isn’t found, make it 0, and when it is, make
// it 1, and then that way we’ll only find shit once.
// yeah. that’ll work. f*ck it.
// P.S. stop drinking

Source: Direct link to the source code
Programming language: C

// Yes, this is the wrong way to build an XML file.
// But you know what? It works, and we still have time
// to go out for drinks after this is built.

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: Opentape
Programming language: PHP

// Happy scrappy hero pup FIFO queue. Or a List. But that’s
// just, like, my opinion, man.
[...]
// By the way I’m on drugs right now, so this code might not
// make too much sense or work.

Source: Direct link to the source code
Programming language: C#

/*
 * the maildirmake stuff is directly in qmail-local.c and
 * qmail-pop3d.c this is simpler and better (Perhaps I’ll
 * find a better way sometimes) ;-)
 * BULLSHIT! Simpler and better, was I on drugs? This needs
 * definitifly a rewrite and while doing that I can also fix
 * the problem with courier.
 */

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: qmail
Programming language: C

/**
 * [...]
 * This seems like such a hack, mostly because it’s in
 * network byte order. Figuring this stuff out sometimes
 * takes a while, but thats ok, because it gives me time to
 * try to figure out what kind of drugs the AOL people were
 * taking when they merged the two protocols.
 */

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: Pidgin
Programming language: C

# Check to see if they want all rows.
# If so, set numrows to 1000000.
# Anyone wanting to see that many rows
# in a web browser is on drugs.

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: oracletool
Programming language: Perl

# “Shit dude, I think we just changed it to boot runlevel 8,
# hehe, f*ck we shouldn’t have smoke that joint on my lunch
# break”

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: YaOP
Programming language: Diff

// nobody reads these f*cking things. why am i writing this.
// because my f*cking roomate needs a goddamn roadmap…
// ohhh ecstasy… haptic pumpkins

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: MatchFinder
Programming language: C++

/*===========================================================
| this … this is the most confusing piece of code i have ever
| seen in my life. i have no idea what it does, *exactly*
| it… does a name lookup or something odd, i can’t quite
| figure out. i certainly wish i had commented it better when
| i wrote it, because i can’t imagine what i was smoking when
| i wrote it. *shrug*
===========================================================*/

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: Netl
Programming language: Yacc

# Son, when you participate in sporting events,
# it’s not whether you win or lose, it’s how drunk you get.

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: Mojo
Programming language: Perl

//If unit is MM, then we can simply check for the min and max
//values of the scan area options, since they won’t change if
//the resolution changes (unless some drunken backend author
//has better ideas :-)

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: QuiteInsane
Programming language: C++

# Note to self: this is what comments are for.
# It’s late, I’m hungry, I don’t want to have
# to remember what I was smoking when I wrote
# this…

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: Net-Blogger
Programming language: Perl

// alright whomever wrote this xml file was smoking something
// serious. In normal XML documents we would do:
// <artist>Daft Punk</artist>
// but in Apple iTunes bong land we do:
// <key>Artist</key><string>Daft Punk</string>

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: Musiker
Programming language: PHP

// incidentally one of my neighbors may be hooking me up with
// a summer job at a firm that writes code for something
// they need good mathmatician-programmers.
// i’m a good mathematician-programmer
// or at least, I think I am…
// am i?
// I don’t think I should have had that third beer…
// I had a first and a second…
// i’m not totally drunk.
// explains why you didn’t think peermanager existed, anyway…

// coding when drunk does not work.
// did you have a first and a second
// because if not, that might be where you’re going wrong
// heh. i can see why you might stand a chance then.
// tbh i thought you were gonna say ‘my neighbour may be
// hooking me up with a girl’ and i was like oh ffs you
// better not say that fortunately, you both exceeded and
// FSASDGS my expectations. so that’s good. :)

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: nishbin
Programming language: C#

# How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides,
# every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff
# out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking
# course, and I forgot how to drive?

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: Mojo
Programming language: Perl

// I know this code may seem a bit confusing and probably
// does stuff in extremely idiotic way. That’s what you get
// when do these things under the infuence of alcohol
// beverage. Needless to say that I had to do a fair amount
// of debugging and restructuring when I sobered up.

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: dOgger
Programming language: C

/* lets see if this works huh. Yeah, i was being told all */
/* the time about slaves being locally removed but not on */
/* the server side… now, enjoy your last supper!, */
/* mauahahaaha… god, gotta leave drugs */

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: ysm ICQ
Programming language: C

/**
 * This file right here has some terrible code in it. Sh*t I
 * must have been smoking dope when I wrote this. This
 * class is inefficient and will need a major overhaul to
 * get to a good state. F*ck!!!
 */

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: sapphire
Programming language: C++

/**
 * modules/m_unkline.c: As the result of a nasty core on
 * hemmet I re-examined this code. I’d truly like to know
 * what kind of drugs I was on when I first did this. really.
 * Anyway, this makes more sense to me.
 */

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: IRCD-Hybrid
Programming language: PHP

/* Message for rpm maintainers: have _shame_. If you want
 * to fix something send the patch to me for sanity checking.
 * “sparcfix” patch is a complete non-sense, apparenly the
 * person prepared it was stoned.
 */

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: android
Programming language: C

/* interlaced image — futz with the vertical trace. i wish
 * i knew what kind of drugs the GIF people were on when
 * they decided that they needed to support interlacing.
 */

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: Chimera
Programming language: C

/* remark:
* – well, this is some major obj spec f*ckup once again. some
* apps store this in 0..1 range, others use 0..100 range,
* even others use 0..2048 range, and again others use the
* range 0..128, some even use 0..1000, 0..200, 400..700,
* honestly, what’s up with the 3d app coders? happens when
* you smoke too much weed i guess. -sea
*/

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: PicoModel Library
Programming language: C

nicht nur im Source Codes sondern auch in Change Logs findet man lustige Kommentare:

* fixed a mem leak in the container cleanup functions
* fixed a mem leak in xform cleanup functions
* decided to stop smoking crack before I code cleanup
* functions

Source: Direktlink zum Change Log
Software: Paranormal

Petze!

/* Andy Church should stop coding while being drunk.
* Here’s the two lines he forgot that produced the
* timed_update evil bug and a *big* memory leak.
*/

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: Anope IRC Services
Programming language: C

;Urko is a dog. Urko is one of my best friends. Urko is a
;fantastic dog becoz sometimes….. Urko SPEAKS!
;Urko is very timid and only speaks to me…and not always…
;urko only speaks when both,urko and me,we start to
;smoke that rare cigarretes that urko has. Then urko start
;to speak a lot of :) and we stay all night speaking, smoking
;and seeing films or playing trivial pursuit, or coding,
;or doing a lot of things :)
;Due this,i named this virus as win32.urk0 :)

Source: Direct link to the source code
Software: win32.Urk0
Programming language: Assembler